Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Me and My "Attitude"

Recently someone I thought was a friend called me out for being a "woman hater."  She did this because I wasn't letting her get away with enforcing a standard of behavior that was blatantly misandrist in nature.  Specifically, she thought it was perfectly fine for women to beat on men, in public.  In addition, she was bragging about the fact that women could do this without suffering any sort of social consequence.

Her exact words were "Yeah.  I get away with hitting men in public because I'm a girl.  Live with it.  You're only complaining because you hate women.  I've known about your attitude and I've put up with it, but now I'm just sick and tired of you always whining about women and the fact that they're finally getting a little equal treatment."

My "attitude."

I have an attitude.

Okay, let's talk about my attitude and what's behind it.

What drives my "attitude" in this case is this:  I acknowledge that people are not physically, intellectually, or psychologically equal.  We are all different, and those differences are what makes each individual person worthy of consideration. Different strengths, different weaknesses.  That, as they say, is what makes horse races.

But despite our differences, I believe, ultimately, that everyone, be they male, female, old, young, black, white, brown, peach, tan, olive-skinned, gay, straight, bi, trans, cis, believer, atheist, left-handed, right-handed, short, tall, able-bodied, disabled, conservative, or liberal, deserves to be on an equal footing with every other person.

That's what I believe.

I am for ultimate equality.

We all have rights, and those rights should be the same for every person.  If Person A enjoys a right, Persons B through Z and back should all have the same rights.  No one should have an advantage over anyone else when it comes to legal standing, privilege, or civil rights.

If you treat a person one way, you must treat all people that way.

That's what drives my attitude.  So if its wrong for a man to hit a woman, its just as wrong for a woman to hit a man.  True gender equality.  That's what I believe.

"Oh!"  I hear someone asking in the back of the lecture hall.  "That means you're a femini--"


It really doesn't.

Not one damn bit.

I reject the assertion that because I ultimately campaign for equal treatment of all people that I am a feminist.  I am not a feminist.  I am a humanist.

Despite the claims of leading Feminists to the contrary, Feminism is not about "equality for all", but rather is about protecting and expanding the special interests of women, and only women (its in the name, folks).  This is not unexpected, nor is it necessarily a bad thing.  But when someone claims that feminism means "equality for everyone", I call bullshit.

I refuse to believe that feminism really is about "equality for all" until I see actual feminists campaigning for the benefit of male domestic violence victims with the same fervor, strength, and determination that they use when campaigning for the benefit of female domestic violence victims.  Or demanding that female criminals be receive the same sentencing that their male counterparts get for committing the same crime.  When I see them actively fighting anti-gay bills that leave gay women alone because they were written in a gender-specific manner, I might start believing it.  When I see them making an effort to punish corporations who use men as laughing stocks in their commercials.  When they start campaigning against the public use of casual violence against men.  When they start advocating for the punishment of women who make false reports of rape that have destroyed some innocent man's life.  When they start advocating for funding of rape counseling and shelters for male victims.  When they advocate for a level playing field when it comes to child custody laws.  When she show acceptance of men and women who want to be stay-at-home mothers and fathers.  When they stop spitting on women who freely choose to take their husband's name in a divorce rather than retain their own (or rather than using a hyphenated combination).  When they stop condemning women for following the strictures of their religions.  When they stop making excuses for women who do things they loudly and violently react to when a man does it.  When they stop crafting messages that assume every man is a potential rapist, while simultaneously ignoring the existence of female rapists.  When they stop intentionally suppressing statistical information that shows that it is women, and not men, who molest and abuse children the most.  When they stop turning their cheeks and dismiss extremist behavior in feminists with "not all feminists are like that", while simultaneously asserting that any man who speaks out for men's issues (or even a man who asserts that there are men's issues in the first place) must be a misogynist.

And lastly, I'll believe feminism stands for "equality for all" when when Feminists stop calling men who point out their hypocrisy and double standards "misogynist," when all they've done is point out how the feminists in question are being hypocrites and holding double standards, in an effort to silence their critics through shaming tactics.Honest criticism isn't misogyny.

Feminists have not been for just fair treatment of women for quite sometime... they have grown power hungry, hypocritical, and even violent. They don't want equal rights, they want more rights than everyone else. They want better treatment for those on their side. I can't get behind a movement like that after seeing the extremes they take on others, especially men.  "Not all feminists are like that."  Yes, but the extremists are the ones forming the public message of feminism.  The inmates, as they say, are now running the asylum.

So yeah.  There it is.  My "attitude" is all about treating people fairly and equally.

The "crime" I committed that caused her to label me a misogynist isn't actually misogyny, but my lack of support for female privilege.  I openly admit it:  I am not a supporter of female privilege.  Neither am I a supporter of male privilege.

I'm a supporter for "universal privilege."

That is, for equality for all.

As human beings, we're all different, and we all have different physical and psychological needs.  But regardless we all deserve the same fair treatment.

Feel free to disagree, if you want.  Tell me that feminism really is about equality a million times.  Until the actions of feminists match their high-fallutin' ideals, I'll just shake my head and tell you how wrong you are.  Also, if you want to send me hate mail and tell me how horrible a person I am for wanting everyone in the world to be treated equally, feel free to send it.  I'm an adult.  I can take it.  I don't have to silence my critics to win the argument.

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